Life is tough. I'm scared

I have been at my workplace for two weeks now. It's very tough, demanding and high pressure. I have canceled my plan twice already - even at the weekend.

I expect that my work will be busy, but nothing prepares me for the demanding nature of the work. I always think of myself as a strong person who will never give up easily. But I have shed tear many times lately. It's just a mixed feeling. I was feeling the pressure and the blame and at the same time I was afraid of losing you. I haven't cried for so long, and it's kind of hard to bear. It's hard when you arrive at the final month of the project.

I'll stay patient and strong. I'll do my best and hope for the best. I will come back here and update how it goes.

Last Day at Work

Believe it or not, today is my last day at work. Life moves pretty fast, especially if you reminisce. I just graduated last year and now I'm moving to a new workplace. Pretty crazy if you ask me. Mixed feeling I am having. Office is so quiet.

Hard To Say Goodbye

Saying goodbye is really not easy. I finally told my boss about my new opportunity. I was asked whether there is any change that would make me change my mind. I was asked about my comment about the current working environment and projects that I’m working on. After telling what was on my mind, I was told to be more open, to better communicate about my needs to the employers and to let your employers know what can better my working situation. I appreciate the sincere comment and intention of her to better my career and to avoid the trial and error path. I was also asked if I want the contact of some key persons who used to work in the field and seek out their comment. I must say I feel sad to see the disappointment in other people. She also told me that she hoped that I would have a good employer.

I should be excited about joining a new firm, but in fact the feeling is mixed. I submitted my resignation letter, so now my resignation is official. I love this quote from a small but full of personality cafe shop: "Explore new roads, follow your heart, don't be afraid to embark on new adventures. You never know what you might find!"

My Commitment

In the next few months, I'd probably go back to this blog to read about my commitment.
I will stay persistent. I will keep calm. I will stay positive and try my best. I will put out the best work that I possibly can. I will ask questions, try to enhance my technical knowledge and soft skills. I will communicate what I enjoy and what I enjoy less in working and try to figure out what can be done differently to move myself and the company forward.

Weekend

This week we finally can watch Beauty and The Beast. I'll also taste Poke if everything goes according to plan. Sunday we plan to go to RUFA to celebrate its 100 year anniversary. Let's see if there is any surprise along the way.
I'll be back here hopefully next week.

Sometimes things just work out

Wow. What can I say. It's been a busy week. I've met with two companies. Recently, I just accepted a job offer from a company. I plan on joining the firm after the new year. After all the stress, the fear, the preparation, I got the job that I believe will take me closer to my dream. Well, writing this blog really let me revisit the old feeling that I had a few weeks ago. Now things just work out if you put in the effort. Life is not all rainbow and butterflies but it's not always dark cloud and storm either. I'm writing another chapter of my life and I don't know where this life is going to take me to. I understand the challenge and stress of this new position, but I'm sure after two year, I'll look back at what I have done and I should smile. I must stay committed and produce the best work that I can.
Looking back, I've done many things for the past few days. I finish The Alchemist, The Little Prince. I've joined many festivals, indoor mountain climbing, football. I haven't gone swimming in a while, but let's take it easy

The Weekend

I'm riding my bike to Bakkheng this Sunday. It's been a long time. I have football to play at the weekend, so i didn't want to push myself too much. I also want to finish some of the work and I need to push myself on that. Ohh I'm going a Lebanese place which should be fun. I like to explore next place and new food.
Have a great weekend!

What A Week!

What a busy week it is. I began the week with a job interview, followed by an international flight to attend a conference. I met many researchers at a think tank, university and diplomats and other young professionals at my age. I had such a good time, visited the landmarks, tried the local food. During the conference, I received an email that I passed the first round of interview and had another interview this coming Monday. I have mixed feeling about the outcome of the interview. I'm excited about getting a job in the industry that I like, but also I understand the challenge and workload. Well, I guess I am young and I should build myself and I am ready for the new challenge. 

There are two major events in Phnom Penh that I want to do this weekend. One is the Phnom Penh Food Festival and Cambodia International Film Festival. We all have a busy weekend and our weekend time is very limited. That's why it's important to choose people to spend the weekend with. So if someone agrees to spend his/her weekend with you, be happy because you are an important person to him/her.

Thousand Things inside My Mind

A thousand things are running inside my mind now. I'm trying to do some preparation for my upcoming interview, but I just could not concentrate. So I was thinking that maybe updating this blog should help. I'm at a coffee shop which I've never been to on Saturday morning. I'd like to go to places that I have never been. I don't think there is a brand loyalty within me. How can I stick to one place all the time if there are literally hundreds of brands enticing clients to use their product/service.

Family Dispute

Anyway, I had breakfast with a colleague who is my referee for a job search. We've talked about work and marriage life. Since he is my senior, he has a lot of experience to share. He also talked about some family dispute. 

Well, one takeaway from this discussion is that before marriage, both parties should be honest upfront and let each other know what they want, so everyone is on the same page. It's better to solve any disagreement before marriage. There is nothing worse than knowing what you want are different after the marriage.

Job Interview

Back to my interview next week. I have some clue about what to expect for this position. But there are just too many things that can be asked. It's probably a better idea to just focus on 3 top questions that have a high possibility of being asked.

Do What Makes You Happy

Forget the ego. Forget about looking needy and desperate. And use that energy on communicating. I feel a lot better knowing that I've done the thing that I could do rather than regretting not doing something.

First Post: The Struggle of Life

Yesterday 23 Feb 2017 I joined a Start Up and Angel Event at Raintree. It was good to see the new startups and young entrepreneur in Cambodia. I can't help but compare myself to them. I know it's not a healthy thing to do by comparing yourself to another, but I can't help. The young entrepreneurs have done a lot of things, met a lot of people from investors to fellow entrepreneurs. Some of them have secured thousands dollar of funding as seed money to expand their business. I am in a 8-to-5.30 job and not sure where my life is heading. I've listened to the pitch of Bookmebus (a mobile platform to buy bus ticket), Mediaload (online media provider) and Codigate (IT solution).

Networking

On to networking, I don't know why I still can't find the courage to go speak to experienced and senior people. I just didn't have the confidence. I only managed to talk with a few friends and some new people. I've talked with many young entrepreneurs. Some of them were like only 20. Well, I just want to talk with them about their business ideas and vision, but I also get the impression of expectation from those young entrepreneur. I did not speak to them with the intention of funding their business or anything. I wanted to speak with the foreign expats dressed in suit and tie, but I just couldn't find the courage to do, as I know that I have almost nothing to help them.

Play and Relationship

I'm pretty active with my life actually. That's one of the positive thing that I can be proud of. I do a lot of cycling, swimming, table tennis, football. I also went to many events lately. Doggy Day, Acoustic event, Scholar Library event, alumni association anniversary. I hope to bring my own dog to the event sometime soon hopefully. Also tried different types food - Middle eastern, French, Japanese. I hope we can explore more food places together: Mexican, Spanish, Portuguese, Italian, Chinese, Korean and join more events together: Farmers Market, Food Festival, Music Festival, Movie Festival and travel to new destination whether it's local or international - Kampot, Koh Kong, Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia, Vietnam, Thai.

I'm thinking of joining Kizuna festival this Sunday. Also I'm traveling abroad M to join a business conference as well, which I am very excited to contribute and meet other professionals from all over ASEAN. I hope to build good relationship with them, as I didn't seize full opportunity of such events in the past.

Where do I go from now?

This part of life is called "Struggle" - struggling between choosing what kind of job to do or starting your own company. I think for now I would concentrate on working first to get more experience, meet more people and save more money. Also I don't have this groundbreaking idea for a business. What I can think of right now is a mobile platform to connect dog owners to dog service providers, from dog salon to dog walking. Also this mobile platform can help find a date for their dog as well. Another hot industry right is financial technology (Fintech). Well, I need to do more research on this hot sector.

But for now, my prototype for the work that I want to do is to become an investment manager within the next 5 years. So I hope do more investment evaluation, study more industries, learn more about deal structuring. I also look forward to talking with finance people in private equity and venture capital.

I promise to update this blog with another post next week. Will try to update what has happened in my life on a weekly basis. 

Until next time.